, ,

The New York Times just published an article that examines whether ‘signs’ have any salience in determining if it’s “meant to be”. The author describes a near death experience that she once had on a date. It seems that a near death experience is as good a reason as any to hope that perhaps this person is the coveted “one”, but she goes on to explain that it didn’t matter. She simply wasn’t interested, regardless of whether or not he saved her life. I laughed when I read this because it was so honest. She simply wasn’t interested and such signs can only do so much to persuade you otherwise. She also argues:

Like many people, I tend to write a story in my head about the future of any relationship before it has even begun, which means I’m constantly looking for signs that it’s either meant to be or not. If you’re unsure about a relationship, or unsure about the trajectory of your life in general, you’re more likely to grasp unusual coincidences or circumstances and give them greater weight than they otherwise deserve.

Before I met my husband, I was the worst at creating these stories and dissecting every moment or instance to see if it was a sign. I remember during my undergrad, there was this guy (let’s call him “Chad”) who hung out with me til the wee hours of the night a couple of nights in a row. We watched a movie. We talked. Not any guy would stay up with me to just talk if he didn’t like me, I thought. Surely Chad thought I was the bee’s knees. Nope. He was a boy with ulterior motives.

So, can you ever really have a sign that it’s meant to be? Do such signs even exist? The author of the article concludes by suggesting that perhaps the best sign of all is not looking for a sign. And I would have to agree. It’s meant to be when you no longer have to dream it.

What about you? Do you look for these signs? Have you ever found a sign that actually proved that it was meant to be? If not, how did you know it was meant to be?

[Image of Paul Newman & Joanne Woodward from: Snippet & Ink]